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KidTOPICS: The "Chores Theory"
We all remember growing up with chores - the "dreaded" chores! Well they do not have to be looked at in such a negative manner. Rather, they hold great potential in constructively directing your older toddler and young child to listen to directions, follow through with instructions, and complete tasks with success - all of which promote to improve self-esteem in children.
There are many options as to the proper time to introduce and utilize the "Chores Theory", as well as the degree of challenge of the actual activity. To start, review our foundation of recommendations provided here, then review in detail any further questions with your OWN pediatrician.
WHEN:
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...to start - Most recommend you consider utilizing chores as a means of rewarding and encouraging good behavior at or near age 4. Certainly school-aged kids should have their assigned, routine chores.
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..to perform - Encourage them to become part of the daily personal and/or family routine. It is best to have your child complete the "work" before the "play."
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HOW:
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Make chores attainable. For the first year after introduction (age 4-5), have rather simple, "one-stepped" chores ("take your plate to the sink after dinner each night"). In the second year after introduction, have two-stepped chores ("set the table before dinner, help clean off the table after dinner"), etc. Make sure your child can successfully complete the chore with just mild-to-moderate effort. Remember, WE WANT SUCCESS in the child's mind, not simply "the garbage taken outside!"
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Be visual - allow your child to visualize their success with chores. A great way to do this is to have a chart and star stickers (or something similar) to allow them to track their success (or failure). List their chores in rows and days of the week in columns. Give a star for each successful chore. Tally them up at the end of each week and provide a cash-in system where they can receive rewards (or "allowance", but it doesn't necessarily have to be money) for "X" number of stars (e.g. - 5 stars gets a chocolate treat, 10 stars gets a matchbox car, 20 stars allows them to pick out the week's family video rental, etc.).
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If they do not succeed, DON'T give in and give them their "star."
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Allow homework to be credited as a "chore."
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Give an occasional "chore vacation."
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Remember to be fair. The goal is not simply to have work completed around the house, but to institute good behavior and improve self-esteem in your child's mind.
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